Dear Toy Companies,

Cut me a break. I am desperately attempting to rid myself of this collecting affliction. I’m doing my best, but these kind of deep cuts are sucking me in to new, dangerous worlds of products. For example.

These toys echo not just cool heroes from my childhood, but weird versions. Purple, giant “M” Magneto? Fresh from the future, a future where bandanas are wildly popular, Bishop? Jubilee? Jubilee? Really? And the throw-in Wolverine, I’m not crazy about. (Nor am I banana jacket Jubilee, but the Magneto makes up for it)  But these “mini-mates” are just about a reasonable enough size that I could keep them neatly arranged and also easily hidden (swept into a drawer) when other grown-ups are about.

For my adult life style, and wallet, please refrain from making anymore of these. And making them limited edition doesn’t help either – it’s like saying the cocaine is caramel flavored. Stop.

Signed,

A Fan.

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